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post pregnancy weight loss supplements | Dont Feed Me

Sabtu, 09 April 2016

post pregnancy weight loss supplements


As I mentioned before, on Mothers Day weekend we had a crowd of family here to celebrate the arrival of Isaac. It was quite a busy weekend and Jack was coming off of 3 busy weeks of having various family members here. I dont know if it was the sudden onset of spring allergies or the general lack of rest, but Jack came down with a serious cold on Friday. As the afternoon wore on I noticed that he looked more tired than usual and then I realized he also had a fever.

With the onset of the fever we decided that he would have to sleep in our bedroom instead of with his cousins and that we needed to try to implement some degree of quarantine – easier said than done. The best solution we had was to tell Jack he could only touch Isaacs feet and to not get near his face, and to not get too close to his cousins. Washing hands became mandatory as did coughing into his arm. We also tried to get him to rest, but that was an uphill battle.

Jacks fever broke shortly after we administered Tylenol and put him to bed. The mama in me is always a little nervous when my baby(ies) get sick. When I woke around 2am to nurse Isaac, I noticed that Jack had pretty labored breathing. As I finished with Isaac, Jack sat up on his pallet and started wheezing. I immediately woke Daniel up and then checked Jack to make sure he was doing ok. He had a fever again and said that it was hard to breathe. 

Daniel and I agreed that we didnt want to mess with breathing issues, so we gave Jack more Tylenol and then Daniel took Jack to the ER. By the time they arrived at the ER, Jacks fever had broke (thank you Tylenol) and the cool night air had helped his breathing. The doctor at the ER told Daniel that Jack basically had a cold. Thanks doc! Needless to say, Daniel and I got very little sleep that night and our house full of people were none the wiser.

The next morning Daniel and I slept in, but Jack was feeling better so he and joined the rest of the family for breakfast. Later that morning when I finally got up, my mom mentioned that they hadnt fed Jack anything. I asked why and she said that Jack was wearing a sticker that said not to feed him.

Then my sister then walked up and mentioned that Jack had told them he had been to the hospital but no one believed him (they thought he was talking about the hospital for Isaacs birth)! I was able to verify the hospital trip and get Jack some breakfast. Who would have guessed that a sticker would cause such confusion?!

"Wasnt sure if my sis was trying to mess with us, or if I should actually believe my nephews sticker he appeared with this morning. Dont feed him....Turns out he went to the hospital in the middle of the night for a bad cough/breathing trouble, but was fine." #youdontseethateveryday


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mumsnet pregnancy weight lose | Trying Again

Jumat, 08 April 2016

mumsnet pregnancy weight lose


Yesterday (Christmas) was one of the hardest days of my life. Everywhere I looked amongst the family celebrations, I saw the ghosts of our missing children. When the cousins played together, there was one missing. When we took family photos, they felt so incomplete. My stomach felt so small and flat and empty. I mostly thought of the first child we lost, Francis, the one who would be seven months now. I wonder if next Christmas will be just as hard. Which child will I think about then? Francis or Julian, who would be celebrating their second Christmas then? Or the little ones who would be born in the next year, Adrienne or Christian, who would be celebrating their first Christmas? Knowing that its not even possible for me to hold a baby in my arms next Christmas made the day even more bleak. I felt robbed of Christmas past, Christmas present, and Christmas future.

Maybe this year is just so hard because I miscarried less than a week before Christmas? Although maybe Ill miscarry a week before next Christmas too. Or maybe Ill be pregnant then, far enough along that Ill be feeling confident, and not  the deep despair and fear that early pregnancy holds for me now. I can only pray that is the case, I cant even hope for it anymore.

What this last, fourth miscarriage has finally done that the first three were unable to accomplish was strip me of all hope. One, two, even three miscarriages in a row can be explained by chance, bad luck, even three different random, unrelated occurrences. Four is...heavy. There is the weight of an underlying cause there. So far, my doctor hasnt been able to find it. Ill have surgery next month to check on a few more things, all which are fairly unlikely anyway, but if my doctor doesnt find anything then thats it. There will be no more treatable causes, everything else would just be an answer with no solution. And I dont feel the desire to know just to know; if there is nothing I can do about it, the knowledge has no meaning to me.

Im still young (though repeat pregnancy loss has aged me in ways I cant really explain; I feel so old inside) and potentially have many more years of fertility before me. Well keep trying, over and over again, knowing that there is some possibility, no matter how small, that I will be able to give birth to a living child. Lucia is proof of that. How we got lucky with a healthy first pregnancy, Ill never know but Im so grateful for that. Well try again as soon as Im physically well enough, emotionally healed enough, and get the go ahead from my doctor.

While I have some friends who struggle with hyper fertility who look at their future years of potential fertility and count how many children that could possibly mean, I think in terms of how many miscarriages those years can bring. Unless Im coming straight off a miscarriage (which is apparently a very fertile time according to studies Ive read and my personal experience), it takes me longer than the average woman to get pregnant, but not by much. I can get pregnant. Four pregnancies in less than a year and a half prove that. Four miscarriages in 14 months. Even if my fertile years end early and fertility decreases over time, I could still have 20+ miscarriages. The odds for that are small, of course. In 20 pregnancies, Id most likely bring at least a few babies to birth. But, when I see my future, 20 miscarriages is one of the possibilities I can visualize. I can no longer visualize an outcome where there is a baby in my arms. My mind just cant conceptualize that anymore.

As Catholics, we believe that pregnancy should only be postponed (using Natural Family Planning) for serious reasons. Those reasons vary by couple of course and the Church does not have a list of reasons. Personally, David and I cant justify postponing pregnancy based on miscarriage risk alone. As long as I am (physically and emotionally) healthy enough to get pregnant again, we wont prevent it beyond the few months my doctor asks us to wait after a loss. (Whether to wait to not, and how long, after a miscarriage is controversial as there are studies that show getting pregnant again right away has better outcomes and other studies show the opposite. Weve decided to give my doctor the benefit of the doubt and follow all my doctors instructions for the time being. Ive gotten pregnant right away and Ive waited and both had the same outcome anyway.)

The idea of not charting and not specifically trying to get pregnant but just letting it happen when it happens is very appealing to me, because the trying is very stressful in itself. But as long as my doctor still has hope that we can find a treatable cause and that catching a pregnancy early will give the baby a better chance of survival, Ill suffer through it. Charting seems to force us to specifically try to get pregnant each month because we know exactly when our fertile days are and we have to decide whether we will have sex then. Since we want a baby, we feel like we cant not use those days. If we didnt chart and didnt know which exact days were most fertile, I dont think Id end up a puddle of tears every time my period came because I wouldnt know if we actually tried to get pregnant. It wouldnt be a disappointment, another proof that my body doesnt work quite right. There wouldnt be that expectation that we did everything right, well get pregnant this month, oh please, oh please, oh please.

Coming to terms with recurrent pregnancy loss (RPL) and what that means for the long term for our family means coming up with a new perspective on life, a new way of living. Even if we having another living child, even if its our very next pregnancy only a year and some months away, that probably wont end my RPL. Ill probably have more miscarriages after that. Of course, I dont know the future, but most likely whatever is causing this isnt going to disappear or ever be completely "fixed". And so that means that we will for the next 10-15 years have cycles of trying to conceive, pregnancy, miscarriage, recovery, trying to conceive, miscarriage, recovery...

And I cant go through those the way I have done in the past. The past year and a half hasnt been living, its been surviving. Ive just tried to get from one stage to another, thinking at some point things will change and well regain our lives. Its been living with the pain of trying to conceive thinking, It will all be better once I get those two pink lines. And then living with the stress and fear and utter despair of pregnancy thinking, It will all be better once I see that heartbeat. And then the heartbeat isnt there or I start bleeding and I think, If I can only make it past this miscarriage. And then the bleeding stops and I start thinking, If only I can make it through the next few months of testing and waiting, then we can try again. And it starts all over. And in the meantime, my life is on hold. There is no joy, there is no moving forward. Everything waits. Everything is at a standstill waiting for the baby, the one we want so badly, the one that will restore a little bit of joy into our family.

I need to find a way to restore that joy without that child, for who knows if that baby will ever come. I need to find a way to truly live in the meantime. And so Ive been working on humility, on saying, Its not about me. Nothing is about me. Its never been about me. I am only here to do Gods will. No matter what I want or I dont want or how much pain I suffer , I can always serve God every situation. It is not about me. It is not about me. Its only about Him. I am only about Him. It is not about my babies that will never be born. It is about The Baby who was born so long ago. It is not about me. And its helping. Most days, this is what gets me out of bed in the morning. Most days, it allows me to focus on the big picture, what really matters. Because its when I focus on the details of my small insignificant life that the pain becomes crushing and I become frozen in the pain and anger and fear.



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pregnancy weight loss tumblr | Isaac is One Month Old

Sabtu, 02 April 2016

pregnancy weight loss tumblr


Has a month already passed? It feels like little Isaac has always been with us. 


We (meaning me and Daniel) are slowly waking from the fog of having a newborn at our house again. Jack has taken the whole new baby thing in stride. He really loves his little brother – though he tells us it hurts his feelings when Isaac cries.


Isaac is our little chubby bunny. At one month he has already gained a whopping 4lbs above his birth weight! His pediatrician wants me to try to stretch out his feedings a bit. Right now he is 10lbs 15oz, 21.5 inches long and has a 40cm head – another big headed boy! 


He is a sweet little guy who loves sleeping and eating above anything else. He has a couple of times a day when he is wide awake and he loves to stare into the eyes of whoever is holding him. Alternately he likes to stare out the window at the trees. At one month old he will grasp your finger and hold on tightly if you give it to him.


Isaac rarely cries, though when he does you would think something catastrophic has happened. Instead of crying, he grunts. The grunts are pretty funny, especially when he gets really mad and the grunts turn to snorts.


The first time we attempted tummy time, he was so mad he almost rolled over on the couch. He was only 10 days old! I was kind of shocked that he was able to rock up onto one hip.


Also at 10 days old, Isaacs umbilical cord fell off and Daniel gave him his first bath, with Jack supervising of course. 


At 2 weeks old, Isaac was big enough to start using cloth diapers. We cant believe how fast he is growing!


As a second child, things have definitely been different for Isaac. Whereas with Jack we were nervous to go anywhere, with Isaac we just keep living our lives as usual...


At 4 days old Isaac went on his first shopping excursion and dinner date to McAlisters with Mommy and Daddy. 


At 5 days old he had his first trip to the park so that his big brother could play. 


At one week we took him to church for the first time, and then went out to eat at a Mexican restaurant as a family. At this stage eating out is still easy so we are embracing this while we are able!


Last week we were finally on our own, and other than being generally tired, things went really well. I even managed to get both boys ready and out the door for a 10am preschool party for Jack and then today we made it to the pediatrician by 9:30.


I have surprised myself in that I can get two kids ready and to places relatively on time (though to be fair, I dont always get breakfast, but the boys are both fed!).


*As with Jack, I will be posting monthly updates of Isaac on a quilt (inherited from my Grandma), next to a yellow Tonka truck (a toy from Daniels childhood).


A Look Back: Jack at One Month
(We used a quilt from Daniels family for the Jack photos, along wit the Tonka truck from Daniels childhood).

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pregnancy weight loss after c section | Your Power

Rabu, 09 Maret 2016

pregnancy weight loss after c section



via Hplrikz.com

I found this quote on Pinterest and its gotten over 100 repins lately, so I know its resonating with us.

 Maybe you needed to hear this today too- that YOU have the power to enjoy your life, to change your life, to change your body, to make a difference starting NOW. 

I hope you have an awesome Sunday! 


This is the day the Lord has made. I will rejoice and be glad in it.  Psalm 118:24

The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him. Psalm 28:7




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after pregnancy weight loss tips | Baby Update 37 Weeks Just Live Your Life

Senin, 29 Februari 2016

after pregnancy weight loss tips


One of the things I like about my OB is that she advocates living your life to the best of your ability, regardless of what may be going on with your body. It was advice she gave me while I was waiting to miscarry and it is something she reminds me of when I express fears over the risks of this pregnancy.

As someone who likes to be in control, the reminder that I cant prevent things from happening any more than I can force things to happen, helps me with my day-to-day living.

 Baby #2, 37 Weeks

Comparison: 37 Weeks Pregnant with Jack

As far as my weekly appointment, things are still looking good. My amniotic fluid is back up to 25cm (which is back in the risk category). The ultrasound tech said that the fluid regenerates every 3 days and it seems like my fluid is just going to hover between 23cm and 27cm. Our baby is still head down, but has not dropped at all and I am dilated to 1cm (with Jack I never dilated until my water broke at 40 weeks). I am anxious to see how things progress in the coming weeks.

In terms of living my life, workouts at the Y keep me sane. I think some people are getting nervous that I continue to show up, while others are happy to see me, knowing that if I am there labor hasnt started yet. With Jack I did kickboxing the day I went into labor and I hope to be able to continue to workout up until the time this baby makes an appearance.


My most uncomfortable symptom right now is swelling. Im just glad it is warm enough to wear Chacos again – my feet are especially thankful. Second to the swelling is the fact that the babys feet are lodged up under my ribs. This can cause some significant pain when he/she starts moving around and kicking.

This week I also swapped to 2 Heparin shots a day. The girl at the pharmacy was appalled when she gave me my meds. She must not have been taught privacy rules because she asked all kinds of questions about the twice-a-day shots. Ill just be glad when I can stop giving myself shots.

I finally got into gear and packed a bag for myself and one for Jack, for a procrastinator like me that is a big deal. Now we just continue to wait.


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pregnancy weight loss after miscarriage | When your body betrays you

Kamis, 25 Februari 2016

pregnancy weight loss after miscarriage



There will never be an appropriate pregnancy book for me to read again. This time, I bought two Catholic pregnancy books. I thought that their focus on the spiritual instead of physical aspects of pregnancy would mean that they would better fit my needs as someone who has had multiple miscarriages. But they included phrases like, "For the next nine months, your baby will grow nourished and protected in your womb," and "Your womb is the safest place your child will ever be, protected and sheltered from the world."

My womb is the most dangerous place for my babies to be. Four out of five of my children have died because my body failed to nurture and protect them. Thats only a 20% chance of surviving me. If they made it through birth alive, theyd have a much better chance "unsheltered in the world" than they do "sheltered" within my womb.

Of course, those pregnancy books were written for most women and most womens bodies do provide a safe environment for their unborn children, even the bodies of drug addicts provide better for their children than I do. Of course, its not my fault. Not any more than you can commend someone who drinks (heavily) and smokes and does drugs through pregnancy for keeping their child safe. Because their body compensates for their conscious choices, and my body betrays me no matter how much I actively do to promote a healthy pregnancy.

I am an anomaly. Miscarriages are common enough. But even two in a row is relatively rare. Four in a row puzzles my doctors and leaves our friends and family speechless. Everyone - including me - had so much faith in the pregnancy because, surely, it would not happen again. How could it? Four times in a row? The statistics were on my side (as they always are). Even women who have had 4+ miscarriages have about a 70% chance of the next baby being a live birth.

If you want to stun and silence anyone, just tell them youre having your fourth consecutive miscarriage. I know what they are thinking during the stunned silence. But I prayed for you! So many people prayed for you! But youve gone through this so many times before! But its not fair! How could God allow this again? But you did nothing to deserve this! Why am I having a happy, healthy pregnancy when you are not, cannot?

I dont have any of the answers. But truly the answers dont matter. Because it happened. Another of my children is dead. My daughter is still an only child, pining for a sibling. My womb is empty. Sos my heart.






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